Regrets...

Me and Samir..in Albany Mall, Auckland, New Zealand

Hey again!

This is more of a personal blog, about someone who i was once so close to. The experiences i had with the person, i will remember for the rest of my life and these experiences taught me to never take things for granted as one day it could be all gone.

This person was called Samir. He is an Algerian who lives in New Zealand. I met him in my first year of moving to New Zealand, and we did not get on at all. I still remember the first day we met, he was moved next to me in class and asked to borrow my pencils, from then on it was a massive roller coaster of a relationship.

We began getting close when i had lived in New Zealand, Auckland for about 6 months. He and his best friend Dylan would meet me as the beach and we would just hang out and fool around. One day we decided it would be fun to take the coastal walk around the North Shore beaches. This seemed like a good idea, until the tide came in and we found ourselves climbing over rocks with the sea bashing us around and destroying all our belongings. By the end of the little adventure we had survived but with bleeding legs, a broken Ipod and broken mobile phone.

Eventually Dylan and Samir drifted apart and it soon became me and Samir. We were best friends and spent pretty much everyday together. He could be mean to me and i could be mean back, it was just the way we worked. We would spend hours driving around listening to music (for example screaming "Airplanes" by B.O.B and Hayley Williams just so people around us would stop shouting etc etc..). My family also loved Samir, he pretty much lived at my house and we shared almost everything together. He was my best friend. If I'm honest, i don't think ill ever get as close to someone, or enjoy someones company as much as i did his.

However, after about a 3 year relationship of being so close i discovered i was moving back home, to England. The first reaction i had to this news was "What about Samir?". Soon after, i was feeling low down and being hurt once again by a moron of an ex boyfriend. One night he slashed the tires on my car, threw bricks at my window and then acted like nothing had happened. He lied to my family, his family and the police..denying everything. Samir was there for me through the entire time. One day he grabbed my hand in the car and just told me to scream as loud as i could..and we did. We then went on to singing "The best i never had" by Beyonce and relating it to my Ex boyfriend. Samir got me through that experience of heart break twice.

It then began to dawn on us both that i was leaving. We began being nasty to each other and getting angry at each other for silly reasons. I think we were both just hurt. Eventually it came to about 2 months before my departure from New Zealand. I was leaving my sister there who was settled down with her boyfriend and studying at uni. I had lost my best friend because of silly arguments that now i realise meant nothing and i was leaving everyone behind just like i did 4 years prior to this date (when i moved to England and left my entire family behind at the age of 14).

Me and Samir didn't even say goodbye to each other, we hadn't spoken in months and we left on such bad terms. I regret the way we both acted in my last few months in New Zealand. I left a person who i loved the most and spent all my time with for over 3 years with nothing but angry words. I regret doing this, as he meant so much to me, and i think he always will. We have began talking again, but it is not the same when he is on the other side of the world. He hurt me and i hurt him. I regret the fact that our 3 year friendship has come to such ruins because of stupid little arguments.

The experience however has taught me to not focus on the small things that don't matter, but to look ahead in the future and ask myself was it really worth it? Was the fight me and my best friend had really worth it in the end? I don't think so.

So, if you take anything from this rather personal blog today, i hope it is that don't take things for granted, and don't let you feelings and anger take over and ruin things that were once so great. Take a deep breath and rethink the situation. Put yourself in the other persons shoes.

Thanks for reading..any comments or similar stories, please feel free to comment :)

Chloe Hannah Beaumont xxx